Tarakany! — The Happiest Man on Earth — English lyrics

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“The Happiest Man on Earth” (“Самый счастливый человек на Земле”) is a song by the Russian punk rock band Tarakany! (“Тараканы!”, “The Cockroaches!”) featuring the Russian rap band Anacondaz.

I wanted to share the lyrics with my non-Russian-speaking friends and colleagues but couldn’t find an English translation online, so here’s my (very quick and rough) attempt at translating it.

In poverty and in melancholy
And in any big trouble
You can find those who hang by a hair,
Who feel even worse than you.

And when your life turns into hell,
And the sunshine fades,
Know that there’s no one happier than you
On the best of the planets.

As long as you’ve got arms, legs,
And a head on the shoulders,
As long as you’re good for something,
Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
You’re young and free,
Which means you have everything.
As long as you’re good for something,
Pity someone else.

(Rapping by Anacondaz)
For example, recall John Coffey from The Green Mile.
Remember? Yes, he got fried there.
So, when you feel bad, think about this movie.
Unlike for you, asshole, we do feel sorry for John.
You whine all the time, something is not working out.
Would you be able to cure Tom Hanks’s balls?
Well, John Coffey could, but no one cared.
And that didn’t save John Coffey.
There’s no justice, bro, c’est la vie.
Wipe your nose, no offence.
There’s already no one strong left in this world.
At least yourself, don’t waste your energy on pity.
Don’t waste your energy on pity!


So, when you feel bad, there’s always someone who feels worse.
They have problems with registration, drugs, guns.
And you sit at home and cry that no one needs you.
Go the fuck out on the street and see what it’s like there.

Six years old boy is refused when he tries to buy cheap wine.
He sits in the basement and sniffs glue.
His mom doesn’t care about his problems
Because she is sixteen.

Take a look at yourself and others.
How many times a day do we say the word “I”?
When choking from tiny failures and laughable problems
Remember that there’s no one happpier than you on the whole Earth.

Chorus x2